Dumb Jokes Posted Here.... if you dare.

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Don Kuykendall_RIP

RIP :(
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WARNING! SCAM ALERT! Be on the lookout for these two women. They are hanging out around the Jay-C and Wal-Mart parking lots. When you are putting your groceries away they ask you for a ride to McDonald's.They are very convincing and very hot! Once in your car this one takes her clothes off and starts climbing all over you while she keeps you busy, the other one takes your wallet. I've had mine taken on the 1st, 3rd, 4th and twice yesterday and probably two more times tomorrow. Wal-Mart has wallets for $2.99,but I found some at the Dollar Store for .99¢ so I bought all they had. These two harlets not only take your wallet, but you never even make it to McDonald's so I've already lost 10lbs. Keep a lookout for them. ( I find lunch time and around 5:30 are the best times)
 
D

Don Kuykendall_RIP

RIP :(
Several women appeared in court, each accusing the others of causing the trouble they were having in the apartment building where they lived.
The women were arguing noisily even in the court.
The judge, banging his gavel to quiet them said, "We are going to do this in an orderly manner. I can't listen to all of you at once. I'll hear the oldest first."
The case was dismissed for lack of testimony.
 
D

Don Kuykendall_RIP

RIP :(
A very successful attorney parked his new Porsche 911 Turbo in front of his office, ready to show it off to his colleagues. As he was getting out, a truck came barreling down the road, drifted right and completely tore off the driver's door.

Fortunately, a policeman was close enough to see the accident and pulled up behind the now door-less Porsche with his lights flashing. Before the officer had a chance to ask any questions, the attorney started screaming hysterically about how his precious Porsche that he had just purchased the day before, was completely ruined and no matter how any car body shop tried to make it new again, it would never be the same.

After the lawyer finally wound down from his rant, the officer shook his head in disbelief, "I cannot believe how materialistic you lawyers are," he said, "You are so focused on your possessions that you neglect the most important things in life."

"How can you say such a thing?" asked the lawyer.

The cop replied, "Do you not even realize that your left arm is missing? It was severed when the truck hit you!"

"Oh, MY GOD!" screamed the lawyer. . ."My Rolex!"


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
 
D

Don Kuykendall_RIP

RIP :(
Splinters in her crotch
A woman from Los Angeles, who was a tree hugger, a liberal‎ Democrat, and an anti-hunter, purchased a piece of timberland near Colville, WA. There was a large tree on one of the highest points in the tract. She wanted a good view‎ of the natural splendor of her land so she started to climb the big tree. As she neared the top she encountered a spotted owl that attacked her. In her haste to escape, the
woman slid down the tree to the ground and got many splinters in her crotch.
In considerable pain, she hurried to a local ER to see a doctor. She told him she was an environmentalist, a democrat, and an anti-hunter and how she came to get all the splinters.
The doctor listened to her story with great patience and then told her to go wait in the examining room and he would see if he could help her. She sat and waited three hours before the doctor reappeared..
The angry woman demanded, "What took you so long?"
He smiled and then told her, "Well, I had to get permits from the Environmental Protection Agency, the Forest Service, and the Bureau of Land Management before I could remove old-growth timber from a "recreational area" so close to a waste removal facility. I’m sorry, but due to Obama-Care... they turned you down.”
GOD BLESS
AMERICA
 
nikonpup

nikonpup

Senior Member
don kuykendall said:
View attachment 256676

warning! Scam alert! Be on the lookout for these two women. They are hanging out around the jay-c and wal-mart parking lots. When you are putting your groceries away they ask you for a ride to mcdonald's.they are very convincing and very hot! Once in your car this one takes her clothes off and starts climbing all over you while she keeps you busy, the other one takes your wallet. I've had mine taken on the 1st, 3rd, 4th and twice yesterday and probably two more times tomorrow. Wal-mart has wallets for $2.99,but i found some at the dollar store for .99¢ so i bought all they had. These two harlets not only take your wallet, but you never even make it to mcdonald's so i've already lost 10lbs. Keep a lookout for them. ( i find lunch time and around 5:30 are the best times)
Click to expand...
i checked the $ store all sold out of wallets. :-(
 
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