Dumb Jokes Posted Here.... if you dare.
- Thread starter TedG954
- Start date
Blade Canyon
Senior Member
Nikonpup, those last four attachments aren't showing up.
Fortkentdad
Senior Member
Am I the only one who keeps clicking on these great offers only to learn that no flashes are on sale?
Patrick M
Senior Member
Three bulls hear the rancher is bringing another bull onto the ranch, and will most likely be reassigning cows to each one.
The first bull says to the others, “I’ve been here five years. I’m not giving this new bull any of my 100 cows.”
“I’ve been here three years,” says the second bull, “and have earned my right to 50 cows. I’m keeping all my cows.”
“I’ve only been here a year,” the third bull says, “and so far, you guys have only let me have ten cows. I may not be as big as you fellows, but I’m keeping all 10 of my cows.”
Just then, an 18-wheeler pulls up in the pasture carrying the biggest bull they’ve ever seen. At 4,700 pounds, each step he takes strains the steel ramp.
Terrified, the bulls immediately change tack. “I think I can spare a few cows for our new friend,” the first bull offers.
“I actually have too many cows to take care of. I can spare a few. I’m certainly not looking for an argument,” the second says.
They look over at the third bull and find him pawing the dirt, shaking his horns and snorting.
“Son, don’t be foolish, let him have some of your cows and live to tell the tale,” the first bull urges.
“Hell, he can have all my cows, the third bull responds. I’m just making sure he knows I’m a bull.”
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The first bull says to the others, “I’ve been here five years. I’m not giving this new bull any of my 100 cows.”
“I’ve been here three years,” says the second bull, “and have earned my right to 50 cows. I’m keeping all my cows.”
“I’ve only been here a year,” the third bull says, “and so far, you guys have only let me have ten cows. I may not be as big as you fellows, but I’m keeping all 10 of my cows.”
Just then, an 18-wheeler pulls up in the pasture carrying the biggest bull they’ve ever seen. At 4,700 pounds, each step he takes strains the steel ramp.
Terrified, the bulls immediately change tack. “I think I can spare a few cows for our new friend,” the first bull offers.
“I actually have too many cows to take care of. I can spare a few. I’m certainly not looking for an argument,” the second says.
They look over at the third bull and find him pawing the dirt, shaking his horns and snorting.
“Son, don’t be foolish, let him have some of your cows and live to tell the tale,” the first bull urges.
“Hell, he can have all my cows, the third bull responds. I’m just making sure he knows I’m a bull.”
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
pnomanikon
Senior Member
The National Poetry Contest had worked its way down to the last 2 finalists - a Harvard English Literature Graduate Student and a West Virginia Hillbilly. (Hey - I was born and raised in WV so I can say that)
The two finalists were on the stage of the large auditorium filled with intellectuals from all over the world. They were all saying to themselves the hillbilly doesn't stand a chance. The judge came forward and announced that, for the final competition, each was to compose a poem using the word "Timbuktu". The audience knew the hillbilly was already defeated.
First came the Harvard grad student: Cross the lonely desert sand, trekked the lonely caravan. Men and camels two by two, destination - Timbuktu.
The audience went wild. No way the hillbilly could top that!
Then the WV Hillbilly stepped up to the mic: Me an' Tim a-huntin' we went, met three whores in a pop-up tent. They was three and we was two, so I buk one and Tim buk two.
Who would you vote for?
The two finalists were on the stage of the large auditorium filled with intellectuals from all over the world. They were all saying to themselves the hillbilly doesn't stand a chance. The judge came forward and announced that, for the final competition, each was to compose a poem using the word "Timbuktu". The audience knew the hillbilly was already defeated.
First came the Harvard grad student: Cross the lonely desert sand, trekked the lonely caravan. Men and camels two by two, destination - Timbuktu.
The audience went wild. No way the hillbilly could top that!
Then the WV Hillbilly stepped up to the mic: Me an' Tim a-huntin' we went, met three whores in a pop-up tent. They was three and we was two, so I buk one and Tim buk two.
Who would you vote for?
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Don Kuykendall_RIP
RIP :(
[h=1]Meanwhile in Florida, the alligators have developed sign making skills.[/h]
