To our Nikonites family
This year has been a long one for us as you all know. I battled cancer, I had surgery for an etopic pregnancy and now I fought an illness that no one really likes to talk about for whatever reason. Life has thrown our family some major curve balls, and I have not handled things very well. Many positive things have happened and then there are not so many good things. Rick started a new position in his company and started working a new shift, which is great and I am so proud of him! Rick has been through so much the last 2 months his health is fine and he is doing well, so this has nothing to do with him. This is where the not so good comes in. Back in August I was hospitalized and same with September. Within 3 weeks apart I was in a mental health facility for depression and schizophrania. This subject is so taboo to some that they are not confident to talk about, but having you all as family makes this so much easier for me to talk to you all about my illness. I have been battling my mental illness for years and just when things start to get stressful we found out that I do not handle stress all to well. Life is stressful and life is life, but somehow my brain tends to think good things are bad also even though it is for the good. I thought I was handling the surgeries, Rick starting his new shift and position, and my own battles just fine but in all actuality I wasn’t. My brain was on overload no matter how good or bad a situation really is or was. So I had to do the hardest thing in the world and that was to admit defeat. I miss you all so much but I had to get myself better, I have lapsed on my photography and this is when I should be picking it up and using my emotions as my canvas, but it would all be dark and distorted that is not what I want my canvas to be about. I am on the mend now and doing better now that my medications have been tweaked a bit and now I am more in the right frame of mind. I will be back and will have my hobby back but with everything else it just takes time and right now I need to take time for my family and for myself, but I will be back full force soon enough until then please know that I am thinking of you all and I do pop on now and then to look at new pictures and threads I just do not comment. I just wanted to let you all know what has been going on.