Dumb Jokes Posted Here.... if you dare.

nikonpup

nikonpup

Senior Member
h0B4477D2.jpg
 
M

mikew_RIP

Senior Member
Registration on the first day back at school

Ahmed Al Sheriah

"here"


Mustafa Al Sheriah
"here


"Fatima El Bindiri
"here"


Ali Acmah Shabeeb
"here"


Ali Sun Al En
No answer


Ali Sun Al En?
Little girl at the back stands up and says

"It's pronounced Alison Allen, for f***'s sake.."
 
M

mikew_RIP

Senior Member
Vladimir Putin, wanting to get on the good side of voters, goes to visit a school in Moscow to have a chat with the kids. He talks to them about how Russia is a powerful nation and how he wants the best for the people.

At the end of the talk, there is a section for questions. Little Sasha puts her hand up and says "I have two questions. Why did the Russians take Crimea ? And why are we sending troops to Ukraine ?"

Putin says "Good questions..." But just as he is about to answer, the bell goes, and the kids go to lunch.

When they come back, they sit back down and there is room for some more questions, another girl, Misha, puts her hand up and says

"I have four questions. My Questions are - Why did the Russians invade Crimea ? Why are we sending troops to Ukraine ? Why did the bell go 20 minutes early? And Where is Sasha?"




 
Michael J.

Michael J.

Senior Member
A man asks a farmer near a field, “Sorry sir, would you mind if I crossed your field instead of going around it? You see, I have to catch the 4:23 train.”

The farmer says, “Sure, go right ahead. And if my bull sees you, you’ll even catch the 4:11 one.”


​
 
M

mikew_RIP

Senior Member
Why I Like Retirement !

Question: How many days in a week?
Answer: 6 Saturdays, 1 Sunday



Question: When is a retiree's bedtime?
Answer: Two hours after he falls asleep on the couch.


Question: How many retirees to change a light bulb?
Answer: Only one, but it might take all day.



Question: What's the biggest gripe of retirees?
Answer: There is not enough time to get everything done.


Question: Why don't retirees mind being called Seniors?
Answer: The term comes with a 10% discount.



Question: Among retirees, what is considered formal attire?
Answer: Tied shoes.


Question: Why do retirees count pennies?
Answer: They are the only ones who have the time.



Question: What is the common term for someone who enjoys work and refuses to retire?
Answer: NUTS!


Question: Why are retirees so slow to clean out the basement, attic or garage?
Ans wer: They know that as soon as they do, one of their adult kids will want to store stuff there.



Question: What do retirees call a long lunch?
Answer: Normal ........



Question: What is the best way to describe retirement?
Answer: The never ending Coffee Break.


Question: What's the biggest advantage of going back to school as a retiree?
Answer: If you cut classes, no one calls your parents.



Question: Why does a retiree often say he doesn't miss work, but misses the people he used to work with?
Answer: He is too polite to tell the whole truth.




And, my very favorite.... QUESTION: What do you do all week?
Answer: Monday through Friday, NOTHING..... Saturday & Sunday, I rest.


 
J

JH Foto

Senior Member
A man called at my door yesterday.
"are you happy with your broadband provider?" he asked
"very much, but I'm sure you're going to tell me why I should change it?" I said
"that's exactly it, sir," he replied. "I've been using yours from across the road for months but it's starting to get a bit slow."
 
Top