Insecurities we don't see.

I have a shoot tonight and before any shoot I find out what a person likes about themselves and doesn't like so much. The lady I am shooting tonight is gorgeous both as a person and physically. She shared with me what she doesn't like about her physical self, to which I said that would be no problem at all. However, in my head all I could do is scream WHAT? Any one looking at her would completely disagree, it would be unanimous, but I am so glad I asked because I never would have suspected her insecurity.

It's too bad we can't see ourselves for who we really are, at least in her case.

I think many of us don't like how we look in some way or another. (Pardon the sexest remarks coming up) Women generally don't like their perceived wrinkles even though they are beautiful as they are. I have gotten into the habit of using Portrait Pro to polish the face just a little. Not enough to make anyone ask what did you do. But I have had the women I did that to tell me they wanted me to go around with them all the time so I could make them look good all the time. Never overdo a portrait but take a couple of minutes and soften the major "defects" even with men it helps. I am old and have some dark spots on my head and forehead that with the really great cameras my wife shoots me with makes me look even older than I really am. I take a couple of minutes to lighten them up but not make them go away.

My biggest problems is my good looks,my wife says my biggest problem is my eyesight

mikew said:

My biggest problems is my good looks,my wife says my biggest problem is my eyesight

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I say it's my good looks as well, but she says it's my ego.

On a serious side, the shoot went spectacular. I made her feel comfortable and as I shot and shared the work, letting her peek on the back of the camera, she felt good.

But doesn't everyone critique themselves in a photo far more than critiquing others? Since she may not know much about photography, she may have thought your comment came from you knowing how to hide certain flaws. No matter how beautiful, confident, or intelligent a person is, almost everyone wants to improve somehow.

I used to work for a women's health club. Some women whose muscles were beautifully sculpted and whose looks were equally as nice kept looking for ways to improve. Yet many women who really needed to lose weight or increase muscle tone just couldn't understand how these picture perfect women found flaws with themselves. Quite often, we always want more...just like always wanting more gear than we can afford.

hark said:

she may have thought your comment came from you knowing how to hide certain flaws.

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Great insight. Hadn't thought of that. Interesting too because that is why I asked, to not feature what she doesn't like and when photographed, present it in a pleasing way.