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Message: <blockquote data-quote="gqtuazon" data-source="post: 636812" data-attributes="member: 6573"><p>For you Don</p><p></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Calibri'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: #000000">1. What's the difference between stress, tension and panic?</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Calibri'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: #000000">Stress is when wife is pregnant;</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Calibri'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: #000000">Tension is when girlfriend is pregnant;</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: #000000"><span style="font-family: 'Calibri'">Panic is when both are pregnant! </span></span></span></p><p></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Calibri'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: #000000">2. Grammar Teacher: Do you know the importance of a period?</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: #000000"><span style="font-family: 'Calibri'">*Kid: Yeah, once my sister said she has missed one, my momfainted, dad got a heart attack & our gardener ran away!</span></span></span></p><p></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Calibri'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: #000000">3.  A young boy askshis Dad: "What is the difference between confident and confidential?</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: #000000"><span style="font-family: 'Calibri'">*Dad says: "You are my son, I'm confident about that.Your friend over there, is also my son, that is confidential!</span></span></span></p><p></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Calibri'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: #000000">4. A bookseller conducting a market survey asked a woman;</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Calibri'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: #000000">“Which book has helped you most in your life?”</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: #000000"><span style="font-family: 'Calibri'">*The woman replied, “My husband’s check book!”</span></span></span></p><p></p><p><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: #000000"><span style="font-family: 'Calibri'">5. A prospective husband in a book store: Do you have a bookcalled, Husband the Master of the House? *Sales Girl: “Sir, Fiction and Comicsare on the 1st floor!"</span></span></span></p><p></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Calibri'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: #000000">6. Someone asked an old man: “Even after 70 years, you stillcall your wife Darling, Honey, Love." What’s the secret?"</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Calibri'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: #000000">Old man: I forgot her name and I’m scared to ask her!</span></span></span></p><p></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Calibri'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: #000000">7. Wife: I wish I was a newspaper. So I’d be in your handsall day.</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: #000000"><span style="font-family: 'Calibri'">*Husband: I too wish that you were a newspaper. So I couldhave a new one every day!</span></span></span></p></blockquote><p></p>

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