Reply to thread

Message: <blockquote data-quote="jay_dean" data-source="post: 608234" data-attributes="member: 34040"><p><span style="color: #000000"><span style="font-family: 'verdana'">Never let it be said that ground crews lack a sense of humour. </span></span></p><p><span style="color: #000000"><span style="font-family: 'verdana'">Here are some actual maintenance complaints submitted by Qantas' Pilots and the solutions recorded by maintenance engineers.</span></span></p><p><span style="color: #000000"><span style="font-family: 'verdana'"></span></span></p><p><span style="color: #000000"><span style="font-family: 'verdana'">Pilots: Left inside main tyre almost needs replacement. </span></span></p><p><span style="color: #000000"><span style="font-family: 'verdana'">Engineers: Almost replaced left inside main tyre.</span></span></p><p><span style="color: #000000"><span style="font-family: 'verdana'"></span></span></p><p><span style="color: #000000"><span style="font-family: 'verdana'">Pilots: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough. </span></span></p><p><span style="color: #000000"><span style="font-family: 'verdana'">Engineers: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft.</span></span></p><p><span style="color: #000000"><span style="font-family: 'verdana'"></span></span></p><p><span style="color: #000000"><span style="font-family: 'verdana'">Pilots: Something loose in cockpit. </span></span></p><p><span style="color: #000000"><span style="font-family: 'verdana'">Engineers: Something tightened in cockpit.</span></span></p><p><span style="color: #000000"><span style="font-family: 'verdana'"></span></span></p><p><span style="color: #000000"><span style="font-family: 'verdana'">Pilots: Dead bugs on windshield. </span></span></p><p><span style="color: #000000"><span style="font-family: 'verdana'">Engineers: Live bugs on back-order.</span></span></p><p><span style="color: #000000"><span style="font-family: 'verdana'"></span></span></p><p><span style="color: #000000"><span style="font-family: 'verdana'">Pilots: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 feet per minute descent. </span></span></p><p><span style="color: #000000"><span style="font-family: 'verdana'">Engineers: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.</span></span></p><p><span style="color: #000000"><span style="font-family: 'verdana'"></span></span></p><p><span style="color: #000000"><span style="font-family: 'verdana'">Pilots: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear. </span></span></p><p><span style="color: #000000"><span style="font-family: 'verdana'">Engineers: Evidence removed.</span></span></p><p><span style="color: #000000"><span style="font-family: 'verdana'"></span></span></p><p><span style="color: #000000"><span style="font-family: 'verdana'">Pilots: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick. </span></span></p><p><span style="color: #000000"><span style="font-family: 'verdana'">Engineers: That's what they're for.</span></span></p><p><span style="color: #000000"><span style="font-family: 'verdana'"></span></span></p><p><span style="color: #000000"><span style="font-family: 'verdana'">Pilots: Suspected crack in windshield. </span></span></p><p><span style="color: #000000"><span style="font-family: 'verdana'">Engineers: Suspect you're right</span></span></p><p><span style="color: #000000"><span style="font-family: 'verdana'"></span></span></p><p><span style="color: #000000"><span style="font-family: 'verdana'">Pilots: Aircraft handles funny. </span></span></p><p><span style="color: #000000"><span style="font-family: 'verdana'">Engineers: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious.</span></span></p><p><span style="color: #000000"><span style="font-family: 'verdana'"></span></span></p><p><span style="color: #000000"><span style="font-family: 'verdana'">Pilots: Target radar hums </span></span></p><p><span style="color: #000000"><span style="font-family: 'verdana'">Engineers: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics.</span></span></p><p><span style="color: #000000"><span style="font-family: 'verdana'"></span></span></p><p><span style="color: #000000"><span style="font-family: 'verdana'">Pilots: Mouse in cockpit. </span></span></p><p><span style="color: #000000"><span style="font-family: 'verdana'">Engineers: Cat installed.</span></span></p><p><span style="color: #000000"><span style="font-family: 'verdana'"></span></span></p><p><span style="color: #000000"><span style="font-family: 'verdana'">Pilots: Noise coming from under instrument panel. Sounds like a midget pounding on something with a hammer. </span></span></p><p><span style="color: #000000"><span style="font-family: 'verdana'">Engineers: Took hammer away from midget</span></span></p></blockquote><p></p>

Verification

Top