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Dumb Jokes Posted Here.... if you dare.
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<blockquote data-quote="nikonpup" data-source="post: 467353" data-attributes="member: 9922"><p style="text-align: center"><span style="font-size: 10px"><strong>A Man and His Ostrich</strong></span></p> <p style="margin-left: 20px"> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 10px"> A man walks up to the bar with an ostrich behind him, and as he sits the bartender comes over, and asks for their order. The man says, "I'll have a beer" and turns to the ostrich. "What's yours?"</span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 10px"> </span> <span style="font-size: 10px">I'll have a beer, too" says the ostrich.</span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 10px"> </span> <span style="font-size: 10px">The bartender pours the beer and says "That will be $3.40 please," and the man reaches into his pocket and pulls out exact change for payment.</span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 10px"> </span> <span style="font-size: 10px">The next day, the man, and the ostrich come again, and the man says I'll have a beer," and the ostrich says "I'll have the same." Once again the man reaches into his pocket and pays with exact change.</span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 10px"> </span> <span style="font-size: 10px">This becomes a routine until, late one evening, the two enter again. "The usual?" asks the bartender. "Well, it's close to last call, so I'll have a large scotch" says the man. "Same for me" says the ostrich.</span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 10px"> </span> <span style="font-size: 10px">"That will be $7.20" says the bartender. Once again the man pulls exact change out of his pocket and places it on the bar.</span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 10px"> </span> <span style="font-size: 10px">The bartender can't hold back his curiosity any longer. "Excuse me, sir. How do you manage to always come up with the exact change out of your pocket every time?"</span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 10px"> </span> <span style="font-size: 10px">"Well," says the man, "several years ago I was cleaning the attic and I found an old lamp. When I rubbed it a Genie appeared and offered me two wishes. My first wish was that if I ever had to pay for anything, I just put my hand in my pocket, and the right amount of money will always be there."</span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 10px"> </span> <span style="font-size: 10px">"That's brilliant!" says the bartender. "Most people would wish for a million dollars or something, but you'll always be as rich as you want for as long as you live!</span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 10px"> </span> <span style="font-size: 10px">"That's right! Whether it's a gallon of milk or a Rolls Royce, the exact money is always there," says the man.</span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 10px"> </span> <span style="font-size: 10px">The bartender asks, "One other thing, sir, what's with the ostrich?"</span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 10px"> </span> <span style="font-size: 10px">The man replies "My second wish was for a chick with long legs."</span></p> </p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="nikonpup, post: 467353, member: 9922"] [CENTER][SIZE=2][B]A Man and His Ostrich[/B][/SIZE][/CENTER] [INDENT] [LEFT][SIZE=2] A man walks up to the bar with an ostrich behind him, and as he sits the bartender comes over, and asks for their order. The man says, "I'll have a beer" and turns to the ostrich. "What's yours?" [/SIZE] [SIZE=2]I'll have a beer, too" says the ostrich. [/SIZE] [SIZE=2]The bartender pours the beer and says "That will be $3.40 please," and the man reaches into his pocket and pulls out exact change for payment. [/SIZE] [SIZE=2]The next day, the man, and the ostrich come again, and the man says I'll have a beer," and the ostrich says "I'll have the same." Once again the man reaches into his pocket and pays with exact change. [/SIZE] [SIZE=2]This becomes a routine until, late one evening, the two enter again. "The usual?" asks the bartender. "Well, it's close to last call, so I'll have a large scotch" says the man. "Same for me" says the ostrich. [/SIZE] [SIZE=2]"That will be $7.20" says the bartender. Once again the man pulls exact change out of his pocket and places it on the bar. [/SIZE] [SIZE=2]The bartender can't hold back his curiosity any longer. "Excuse me, sir. How do you manage to always come up with the exact change out of your pocket every time?" [/SIZE] [SIZE=2]"Well," says the man, "several years ago I was cleaning the attic and I found an old lamp. When I rubbed it a Genie appeared and offered me two wishes. My first wish was that if I ever had to pay for anything, I just put my hand in my pocket, and the right amount of money will always be there." [/SIZE] [SIZE=2]"That's brilliant!" says the bartender. "Most people would wish for a million dollars or something, but you'll always be as rich as you want for as long as you live! [/SIZE] [SIZE=2]"That's right! Whether it's a gallon of milk or a Rolls Royce, the exact money is always there," says the man. [/SIZE] [SIZE=2]The bartender asks, "One other thing, sir, what's with the ostrich?" [/SIZE] [SIZE=2]The man replies "My second wish was for a chick with long legs."[/SIZE][/LEFT] [/INDENT] [/QUOTE]
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