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Dumb Jokes Posted Here.... if you dare.
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<blockquote data-quote="mikew_RIP" data-source="post: 466267" data-attributes="member: 14174"><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: #000000"><u><span style="color: black">Pun</span></u><u><span style="color: #1f497d">-</span></u><u><span style="color: black">ography</span></u><span style="color: black"></span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: #000000"><span style="color: black"></span><span style="color: black"></span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: #000000"><span style="color: black"></span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: #000000"><span style="color: black">I changed my iPod name to Titanic. It's syncing now .</span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: #000000"> <span style="color: black">When chemists die, they barium.</span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: #000000"><span style="color: black">Jokes about German sausage are the wurst.</span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: #000000"><span style="color: black">A soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.</span><span style="color: black"></span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: #000000"><span style="color: black"></span><span style="color: black">I know a guy who's addicted to brake fluid. He says he can stop any time.</span> <span style="color: black"></span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: #000000"><span style="color: black">How does Moses make his tea? Hebrews it.</span><span style="color: black"></span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: #000000"><span style="color: black"></span><span style="color: black">I stayed up all night to see where the sun went. Then it dawned on me.</span> <span style="color: black"></span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: #000000"><span style="color: black">This girl said she recognized me from the vegetarian club, but I'd never met herbivore. </span><span style="color: black"></span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: #000000"><span style="color: black"></span><span style="color: black">I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. I can't put it down.</span><span style="color: black"></span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: #000000"><span style="color: black"></span><span style="color: black">I did a theatrical performance about puns. It was a play on words.</span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: #000000"><span style="color: black">They told me I had type A blood, but it was a Type- O.</span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: #000000"><span style="color: black">A dyslexic man walks into a bra.</span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: #000000"><span style="color: black">PMS jokes aren't funny; period.</span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: #000000"><span style="color: black">Why were the Indians in America first? They had reservations.</span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: #000000"><span style="color: black">Class trip to the Coca-Cola factory. I hope there's no pop quiz.</span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: #000000"><span style="color: black">Energizer bunny arrested. Charged with battery.</span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: #000000"><span style="color: black">I didn't like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.</span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: #000000"><span style="color: black">How do you make holy water? Boil the hell out of it!</span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: #000000"><span style="color: black">Did you hear about the cross eyed teacher who lost her job because she couldn't control her pupils?</span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: #000000"><span style="color: black">When you get a bladder infection, urine trouble.</span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: #000000"><span style="color: black">What does a clock do when it's hungry? It goes back four seconds.</span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: #000000"><span style="color: black">I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me!</span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: #000000"><span style="color: black">Broken pencils are pointless.</span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: #000000"><span style="color: black">I tried to catch some fog. I mist. </span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: #000000"><span style="color: black">What do you call a dinosaur with a extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.</span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: #000000"><span style="color: black">England has no kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool.</span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: #000000"><span style="color: black">I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest.</span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: #000000"><span style="color: black">I dropped out of communism class because of lousy Marx.</span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: #000000"><span style="color: black">All the toilets in New York's police stations have been stolen. Police have nothing to go on .</span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: #000000"><span style="color: black">I got a job at a bakery because I kneaded dough.</span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: #000000"><span style="color: black">Haunted French pancakes give me the crepes.</span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: #000000"><span style="color: black">Velcro - what a rip off!</span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: #000000"><span style="color: black">Cartoonist found dead in home. Details are sketchy.</span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: #000000"><span style="color: black">Venison for dinner? Oh deer!</span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: #000000"><span style="color: black">Earthquake in Washington obviously government's fault.</span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: #000000"><span style="color: black">I used to think I was indecisive, but now I'm not so sure.</span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: #000000"></span></span></span></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="mikew_RIP, post: 466267, member: 14174"] [FONT=Arial][SIZE=2][COLOR=#000000][U][COLOR=black]Pun[/COLOR][/U][U][COLOR=#1f497d]-[/COLOR][/U][U][COLOR=black]ography[/COLOR][/U][COLOR=black] [/COLOR][COLOR=black] I changed my iPod name to Titanic. It's syncing now .[/COLOR][COLOR=#1f497d][/COLOR] [COLOR=black]When chemists die, they barium. Jokes about German sausage are the wurst. A soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.[/COLOR][COLOR=black] [/COLOR][COLOR=black]I know a guy who's addicted to brake fluid. He says he can stop any time.[/COLOR][COLOR=black] [/COLOR][COLOR=black] How does Moses make his tea? Hebrews it.[/COLOR][COLOR=black] [/COLOR][COLOR=black]I stayed up all night to see where the sun went. Then it dawned on me.[/COLOR][COLOR=black] [/COLOR][COLOR=black] This girl said she recognized me from the vegetarian club, but I'd never met herbivore. [/COLOR][COLOR=black] [/COLOR][COLOR=black]I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. I can't put it down.[/COLOR][COLOR=black] [/COLOR][COLOR=black]I did a theatrical performance about puns. It was a play on words. They told me I had type A blood, but it was a Type- O. A dyslexic man walks into a bra. PMS jokes aren't funny; period. Why were the Indians in America first? They had reservations. Class trip to the Coca-Cola factory. I hope there's no pop quiz. Energizer bunny arrested. Charged with battery. I didn't like my beard at first. Then it grew on me. How do you make holy water? Boil the hell out of it! Did you hear about the cross eyed teacher who lost her job because she couldn't control her pupils? When you get a bladder infection, urine trouble. What does a clock do when it's hungry? It goes back four seconds. I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me! Broken pencils are pointless. I tried to catch some fog. I mist. What do you call a dinosaur with a extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus. England has no kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool. I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest. I dropped out of communism class because of lousy Marx. All the toilets in New York's police stations have been stolen. Police have nothing to go on . I got a job at a bakery because I kneaded dough. Haunted French pancakes give me the crepes. Velcro - what a rip off! Cartoonist found dead in home. Details are sketchy. Venison for dinner? Oh deer! Earthquake in Washington obviously government's fault. I used to think I was indecisive, but now I'm not so sure.[/COLOR] [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [/QUOTE]
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