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<blockquote data-quote="nikonpup" data-source="post: 402284" data-attributes="member: 9922">
<table style='width: 100%'><tr><td>&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp;&nbsp; 
 
 
 
 
&nbsp; &nbsp; RECTUM&nbsp; STRETCHER (if you don't laugh at this one,&nbsp; there is something&nbsp; wrong.) 
 
 
 
 
 
 
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&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp;&nbsp; While she was &quot;flying&quot;&nbsp; down the road yesterday, a woman passed over a bridge only to find a cop with a&nbsp; radar gun on the other side lying in&nbsp; wait. 
 
 
 
 
 
 
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&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; The cop pulled her&nbsp; over, walked up to the car, with that classic patronizing smirk we all know and&nbsp; love, asked, &quot;What's your hurry?&quot;&nbsp; 
 
 
 
 
 
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&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; To which she&nbsp; replied, &quot;I'm late for&nbsp; work.&quot; 
 
 
 
 
 
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&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; Oh yeah,&quot; said the&nbsp; cop, &quot;what do you do?&quot; 
 
 
 
 
 
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&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp;&nbsp; I'm a rectum&nbsp; stretcher,&quot; she responded.&nbsp; 
 
 
 
 
 
 
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&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; The cop stammered,&nbsp; &quot;A what? A rectum stretcher? 
 
 
 
 
 
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And just what does&nbsp; a rectum stretcher do?&quot;&nbsp; 
 
 
 
 
 
 
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&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &quot;Well,&quot; she said,&nbsp; &quot;I start by inserting one finger, then work my way up to two fingers, then&nbsp; three, then four, then with my whole hand in.&nbsp; I work from side to side until I&nbsp; can get both hands in, and then I slowly but surely stretch it, until it's about&nbsp; 6 feet wide.&quot; 
 
 
 
 
 
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&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &quot;And just what the&nbsp; hell do you do with a 6 foot *sshole ? &quot;&nbsp; he&nbsp; asked. 
 
 
 
 
 
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&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &quot;You give him a&nbsp; radar gun and park him behind a bridge...&quot;&nbsp; 
 
 
 
 
 
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&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; Traffic Ticket -&nbsp; $95.00 
 
 
 
 
 
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&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; Court Costs -&nbsp;&nbsp; $45.00 
 
 
 
 
 
&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp;&nbsp; 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
&nbsp; &nbsp;&nbsp; Look on the Cop's&nbsp; Face...............PRICELESS 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
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[QUOTE="nikonpup, post: 402284, member: 9922"] [TABLE="class: yiv7379231354MsoNormalTable mceItemTable, width: 100%"] [TR] [TD="width: 100%"] [B][COLOR=red]RECTUM STRETCHER[/COLOR][/B] [B][COLOR=red](if you don't laugh at this one, there is something wrong.)[/COLOR][/B] [B]While she was "flying" down the road yesterday, a woman passed over a bridge only to find a cop with a radar gun on the other side lying in wait.[/B] [B]The cop pulled her over, walked up to the car, with that classic patronizing smirk we all know and love, asked, "What's your hurry?" [/B] [B]To which she replied, "I'm late for work."[/B] [B]Oh yeah," said the cop, "what do you do?"[/B] [B]I'm a rectum stretcher," she responded. [/B] [B]The cop stammered, "A what? A rectum stretcher?[/B] [B] And just what does a rectum stretcher do?" [/B] [B]"Well," she said, "I start by inserting one finger, then work my way up to two fingers, then three, then four, then with my whole hand in. I work from side to side until I can get both hands in, and then I slowly but surely stretch it, until it's about 6 feet wide."[/B] [B]"And just what the hell do you do with a 6 foot *sshole ? " he asked.[/B] [B]"You give him a radar gun and park him behind a bridge..." [/B] [B]Traffic Ticket - $95.00[/B] [B]Court Costs - $45.00[/B] [B]Look on the Cop's Face...............PRICELESS[/B] [/TD] [/TR] [/TABLE] [B][FONT=comic sans ms][/FONT][/B] [/QUOTE]

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