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<blockquote data-quote="TedG954" data-source="post: 368371" data-attributes="member: 9701"><p style="margin-left: 20px">[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]<span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'arial'"><span style="font-family: 'HelveticaNeue'"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica'"><span style="font-family: 'HelveticaNeue'"><span style="font-family: 'arial'"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica'"><span style="font-family: 'arial'"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><p style="margin-left: 20px"><span style="font-family: 'HelveticaNeue'"><p style="margin-left: 20px"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><p style="margin-left: 20px"> <table style='width: 100%'><tr><td><span style="font-family: 'times new roman'"><strong>MURDER AT THE WalMart...</strong></span><br /> <br /> <span style="font-family: 'times new roman'">Tired of constantly being broke and stuck in an unhappy marriage, a young husband decided to solve both problems by taking out a large insurance policy on his wife, with himself as the beneficiary, and then arranging to have her killed.</span><br /> <br /> <span style="font-family: 'times new roman'">A 'friend of a friend' put him in touch with a nefarious dark-side underworld figure who went by the name of 'Artie.'</span><br /> <br /> <span style="font-family: 'times new roman'">Artie then explained to the husband that his going price for snuffing out a spouse was $5,000.</span><br /> <br /> <span style="font-family: 'times new roman'">The husband said he was willing to pay that amount, but that he wouldn't have any cash on hand until he could collect his wife's insurance money.</span><br /> <span style="font-family: 'times new roman'"> </span><br /> <span style="font-family: 'times new roman'">Artie insisted on being paid at least something up front, so the man opened his wallet, displaying the single dollar bill that rested inside. Artie sighed, rolled his eyes, and reluctantly agreed to accept the dollar as down payment for the dirty deed.</span><br /> <br /> <span style="font-family: 'times new roman'">A few days later, Artie followed the man's wife to the local Super Wal-Mart store. There, he surprised her in the produce department and proceeded to strangle her with his gloved hands and as the poor unsuspecting woman drew her last breath and slumped to the floor<br /> The manager of the produce department stumbled unexpectedly onto the murder scene. Unwilling to leave any living witnesses behind, ol' Artie had no choice but to strangle the produce manager as well.</span><br /> <span style="font-family: 'times new roman'"> </span><br /> <span style="font-family: 'times new roman'">However, unknown to Artie, the entire proceedings were captured by the hidden security cameras and observed by the store's security guard, who immediately called the police. Artie was caught and arrested before he could even leave the store.</span><br /> <br /> <span style="font-family: 'times new roman'">Under intense questioning at the police station, Artie revealed the whole sordid plot, including his unusual financial arrangements with the hapless husband, who was also quickly arrested.</span><br /> <br /> <span style="font-family: 'times new roman'">The next day in the newspaper, the headline declared...</span><br /> <br /> <span style="font-family: 'times new roman'"><br /> (<em>You're going to hate me for this.</em>)</span><br /> <br /> <br /> <br /> <span style="font-family: 'times new roman'"> \/</span><br /> <span style="font-family: 'times new roman'"><br /> </span><br /> <span style="font-family: 'times new roman'"><br /> </span><br /> <span style="font-family: 'times new roman'"><br /> </span><br /> <span style="font-family: 'times new roman'">\/</span><br /> <span style="font-family: 'times new roman'"><br /> </span><br /> <span style="font-family: 'times new roman'"><br /> </span><br /> <span style="font-family: 'times new roman'"><br /> </span><br /> <span style="font-family: 'times new roman'">\/</span><br /> <span style="font-family: 'times new roman'"><br /> </span><br /> <span style="font-family: 'times new roman'"><br /> </span><br /> <span style="font-family: 'times new roman'"><br /> </span><br /> <span style="font-family: 'times new roman'">\/</span><br /> <span style="font-family: 'times new roman'"><br /> </span><br /> <span style="font-family: 'times new roman'"><br /> </span><br /> <br /> <span style="font-family: 'times new roman'"><strong><span style="color: blue">'ARTIE CHOKES 2 for $1.00 @ WAL-MART!!'</span></strong></span><br /> <br /> </td></tr></table> </p></p> <p style="margin-left: 20px"></span></p></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></p><p style="margin-left: 20px"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'arial'"><span style="font-family: 'HelveticaNeue'"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica'"><span style="font-family: 'HelveticaNeue'"><span style="font-family: 'arial'"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica'"><span style="font-family: 'arial'"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-family: 'HelveticaNeue'"></p></p> <p style="margin-left: 20px"></span></p></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></p><p style="margin-left: 20px"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'arial'"><span style="font-family: 'HelveticaNeue'"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica'"><span style="font-family: 'HelveticaNeue'"><span style="font-family: 'arial'"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica'"><span style="font-family: 'arial'"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-family: 'HelveticaNeue'"></span></p></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></p><p style="margin-left: 20px"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'arial'"><span style="font-family: 'HelveticaNeue'"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica'"><span style="font-family: 'HelveticaNeue'"><span style="font-family: 'arial'"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica'"><span style="font-family: 'arial'"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"></p></p> <p style="margin-left: 20px"></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></p> <p style="margin-left: 20px"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'arial'"><span style="font-family: 'HelveticaNeue'"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica'"><span style="font-family: 'HelveticaNeue'"><span style="font-family: 'arial'"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica'"></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></p> <p style="margin-left: 20px"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'arial'"><span style="font-family: 'HelveticaNeue'"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica'"><span style="font-family: 'HelveticaNeue'"><span style="font-family: 'arial'"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica'"></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></p> <p style="margin-left: 20px"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'arial'"><span style="font-family: 'HelveticaNeue'"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica'"><span style="font-family: 'HelveticaNeue'"><span style="font-family: 'arial'"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></p> <p style="margin-left: 20px"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'arial'"><span style="font-family: 'HelveticaNeue'"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica'"><span style="font-family: 'HelveticaNeue'"><span style="font-family: 'arial'"></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></p> <p style="margin-left: 20px"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'arial'"><span style="font-family: 'HelveticaNeue'"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica'"><span style="font-family: 'HelveticaNeue'"></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></p> <p style="margin-left: 20px"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'arial'"><span style="font-family: 'HelveticaNeue'"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica'"></span></span></span></span></span></span></p> <p style="margin-left: 20px"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'arial'"><span style="font-family: 'HelveticaNeue'"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"></span></span></span></span></span></p> <p style="margin-left: 20px"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'arial'"><span style="font-family: 'HelveticaNeue'"></span></span></span></span></p> <p style="margin-left: 20px"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'arial'"></span></span></span></p> <p style="margin-left: 20px"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: black"></span></span>[/FONT]</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="TedG954, post: 368371, member: 9701"] [INDENT][FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif][SIZE=4][COLOR=black][FONT=arial][FONT=HelveticaNeue][FONT=Arial][FONT=Helvetica][FONT=HelveticaNeue][FONT=arial][FONT=Arial][FONT=Helvetica][FONT=arial][FONT=Arial][INDENT][FONT=HelveticaNeue][INDENT][FONT=Arial][INDENT][TABLE="width: 1013"] [TR] [TD][FONT=times new roman][B]MURDER AT THE WalMart...[/B][U][/U][U][/U][/FONT] [FONT=times new roman][U][/U][U][/U] [/FONT] [FONT=times new roman]Tired of constantly being broke and stuck in an unhappy marriage, a young husband decided to solve both problems by taking out a large insurance policy on his wife, with himself as the beneficiary, and then arranging to have her killed.[U][/U][U][/U][/FONT] [FONT=times new roman][U][/U][U][/U] [/FONT] [FONT=times new roman]A 'friend of a friend' put him in touch with a nefarious dark-side underworld figure who went by the name of 'Artie.'[U][/U][U][/U][/FONT] [FONT=times new roman][U][/U][U][/U] [/FONT] [FONT=times new roman]Artie then explained to the husband that his going price for snuffing out a spouse was $5,000.[U][/U][U][/U][/FONT] [FONT=times new roman][U][/U][U][/U] [/FONT] [FONT=times new roman]The husband said he was willing to pay that amount, but that he wouldn't have any cash on hand until he could collect his wife's insurance money.[U][/U][U][/U][/FONT] [FONT=times new roman][U][/U][U][/U] [/FONT] [FONT=times new roman]Artie insisted on being paid at least something up front, so the man opened his wallet, displaying the single dollar bill that rested inside. Artie sighed, rolled his eyes, and reluctantly agreed to accept the dollar as down payment for the dirty deed.[U][/U][U][/U][/FONT] [FONT=times new roman][U][/U][U][/U] [/FONT] [FONT=times new roman]A few days later, Artie followed the man's wife to the local Super Wal-Mart store. There, he surprised her in the produce department and proceeded to strangle her with his gloved hands and as the poor unsuspecting woman drew her last breath and slumped to the floor The manager of the produce department stumbled unexpectedly onto the murder scene. Unwilling to leave any living witnesses behind, ol' Artie had no choice but to strangle the produce manager as well.[U][/U][U][/U][/FONT] [FONT=times new roman][U][/U][U][/U] [/FONT] [FONT=times new roman]However, unknown to Artie, the entire proceedings were captured by the hidden security cameras and observed by the store's security guard, who immediately called the police. Artie was caught and arrested before he could even leave the store.[U][/U][U][/U][/FONT] [FONT=times new roman][U][/U][U][/U] [/FONT] [FONT=times new roman]Under intense questioning at the police station, Artie revealed the whole sordid plot, including his unusual financial arrangements with the hapless husband, who was also quickly arrested.[U][/U][U][/U][/FONT] [FONT=times new roman][U][/U][U][/U] [/FONT] [FONT=times new roman]The next day in the newspaper, the headline declared...[U][/U][U][/U][/FONT] [FONT=times new roman][U][/U][U][/U] [/FONT] [FONT=times new roman] ([I]You're going to hate me for this.[/I])[/FONT] [FONT=times new roman][U][/U][U][/U] [/FONT] [FONT=times new roman][U][/U][U][/U] [/FONT] [FONT=times new roman][U][/U][U][/U] [/FONT] [FONT=times new roman][U][/U][U][/U] \/[/FONT] [FONT=times new roman] [/FONT] [FONT=times new roman] [/FONT] [FONT=times new roman] [/FONT] [FONT=times new roman]\/[/FONT] [FONT=times new roman] [/FONT] [FONT=times new roman] [/FONT] [FONT=times new roman] [/FONT] [FONT=times new roman]\/[/FONT] [FONT=times new roman] [/FONT] [FONT=times new roman] [/FONT] [FONT=times new roman] [/FONT] [FONT=times new roman]\/[/FONT] [FONT=times new roman] [/FONT] [FONT=times new roman] [/FONT] [FONT=times new roman][U][/U][U][/U] [/FONT] [FONT=times new roman][B][COLOR=blue]'ARTIE CHOKES 2 for $1.00 @ WAL-MART!!'[/COLOR][/B][U][/U][U][/U][/FONT] [FONT=times new roman][U][/U][U][/U] [/FONT] [/TD] [/TR] [/TABLE] [/INDENT][/FONT] [/INDENT] [/FONT] [/INDENT][/FONT] [/FONT] [/FONT] [/FONT] [/FONT] [/FONT] [/FONT] [/FONT] [/FONT] [/FONT] [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][/INDENT] [/QUOTE]
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