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<blockquote data-quote="mikew_RIP" data-source="post: 158294" data-attributes="member: 14174">SCOTTISHWEDDINGAt the Scottish wedding reception the D.J. yelled...&quot;Would all married men please stand next to the one person who has made your life worth living.&quot;The bartender was almost crushed to death.SEXCondoms don’t guarantee safe sex any more ….. A friend of mine was wearing one when he was shot by the woman’s husband.New BookA man goes into a bookshop&nbsp; and asks the young lady assistant, &quot;Do you have the new book out for menwith short penises?&quot;She replies,&nbsp; &quot;I'm not sure if it's in yet.&quot;&quot;That's the one; I'll take a copy…&quot;Poor Lance ArmstrongI think it is just terrible and disgusting how everyone has treated Lance Armstrong, especially after what he achieved, winning 7&nbsp; Tour de France races, while on drugs.When I was on drugs, I couldn't even find my&nbsp; bike. &nbsp;A guy broke into my apartment last week. He didn’t take my TV, just the remote Now he drives by and changes the channels.Sicko&nbsp;&nbsp;Pregnant Prostitute&nbsp;Doctor asks pregnant prostitute, &quot;do you know who the father is?&quot;&nbsp;&nbsp; &quot;For f.... sakes , if you ate a tin of beans would you know which one made you fart?&quot;&nbsp;&nbsp;EASYJETPaddy calls EASYJET to book a flight. The operator asks, &quot;How many&nbsp; people are flying with you?&quot; Paddy replies &quot;I don't know! It's your&nbsp; bloody plane. &quot;</blockquote>

[QUOTE="mikew_RIP, post: 158294, member: 14174"] SCOTTISHWEDDING At the Scottish wedding reception the D.J. yelled... "Would all married men please stand next to the one person who has made your life worth living." The bartender was almost crushed to death. SEX Condoms don’t guarantee safe sex any more ….. A friend of mine was wearing one when he was shot by the woman’s husband. New Book A man goes into a bookshop and asks the young lady assistant, "Do you have the new book out for men with short penises?" She replies, "I'm not sure if it's in yet." "That's the one; I'll take a copy…" Poor Lance Armstrong I think it is just terrible and disgusting how everyone has treated Lance Armstrong, especially after what he achieved, winning 7 Tour de France races, while on drugs. When I was on drugs, I couldn't even find my bike. A guy broke into my apartment last week. He didn’t take my TV, just the remote Now he drives by and changes the channels. Sicko Pregnant Prostitute Doctor asks pregnant prostitute, "do you know who the father is?" "For f.... sakes , if you ate a tin of beans would you know which one made you fart?" EASYJET Paddy calls EASYJET to book a flight. The operator asks, "How many people are flying with you?" Paddy replies "I don't know! It's your bloody plane. " [/QUOTE]

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