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Dumb Jokes Posted Here.... if you dare.
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<blockquote data-quote="gqtuazon" data-source="post: 151800" data-attributes="member: 6573"><p>Ok, here is my shot.</p><p>A good lawyer joke.</p><p></p><p>The madam opened the brothel door in Las Vegas and saw a rather dignified, well-dressed, good-looking man in his late forties or early fifties.</p><p>'May I help you sir?' she asked.</p><p>'I want to see Valerie,' the man replied.</p><p>'Sir, Valerie is one of our most expensive ladies. Perhaps you would prefer someone else', said the madam.</p><p> 'No, I must see Valerie,' he replied.</p><p>Just then, Valerie appeared and announced to the man she charged $5000 a visit. Without hesitation, the man pulled out five thousand dollars and gave it to Valerie, and they went upstairs. After an hour, the man calmly left.</p><p>The next night, the man appeared again, once more demanding to see Valerie.</p><p>Valerie explained that no one had ever come back two nights in a row as she was too expensive. But there were no discounts. The price was still $5000.</p><p>Again, the man pulled out the money, gave it to Valerie, and they went upstairs. After an hour, he left.</p><p>The following night the man was there yet again. Everyone was astounded that he had come for a third consecutive night, but he paid Valerie and they went upstairs.</p><p>After their session, Valerie questioned the man, 'No one has ever been with me three nights in a row. Where are you from?' she asked.</p><p>The man replied, 'San Diego '.</p><p> 'Really', she said. 'I have family in San Diego .'</p><p>'I know.' the man said.'Your sister died, and I am her attorney. She asked me to give you your $15,000 inheritance.'</p><p></p><p>The moral of the story is that three things in life are certain.</p><p> 1. Death</p><p> 2. Taxes</p><p> 3. Being screwed by a lawyer</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="gqtuazon, post: 151800, member: 6573"] Ok, here is my shot. A good lawyer joke. The madam opened the brothel door in Las Vegas and saw a rather dignified, well-dressed, good-looking man in his late forties or early fifties. 'May I help you sir?' she asked. 'I want to see Valerie,' the man replied. 'Sir, Valerie is one of our most expensive ladies. Perhaps you would prefer someone else', said the madam. 'No, I must see Valerie,' he replied. Just then, Valerie appeared and announced to the man she charged $5000 a visit. Without hesitation, the man pulled out five thousand dollars and gave it to Valerie, and they went upstairs. After an hour, the man calmly left. The next night, the man appeared again, once more demanding to see Valerie. Valerie explained that no one had ever come back two nights in a row as she was too expensive. But there were no discounts. The price was still $5000. Again, the man pulled out the money, gave it to Valerie, and they went upstairs. After an hour, he left. The following night the man was there yet again. Everyone was astounded that he had come for a third consecutive night, but he paid Valerie and they went upstairs. After their session, Valerie questioned the man, 'No one has ever been with me three nights in a row. Where are you from?' she asked. The man replied, 'San Diego '. 'Really', she said. 'I have family in San Diego .' 'I know.' the man said.'Your sister died, and I am her attorney. She asked me to give you your $15,000 inheritance.' The moral of the story is that three things in life are certain. 1. Death 2. Taxes 3. Being screwed by a lawyer [/QUOTE]
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