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Dumb Jokes Posted Here.... if you dare.
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<blockquote data-quote="nikonpup" data-source="post: 145549" data-attributes="member: 9922"><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'comic sans ms'"></span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'comic sans ms'"><hr /><p>[h=3] No Pun In Ten Did [/h]PUNS FOR EDUCATED MINDS The fattest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference... He acquired his size from too much pi. I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out to... be an optical Aleutian . </span></strong></p><p> <strong><span style="font-family: 'comic sans ms'">She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still. </span></strong></p><p> <strong><span style="font-family: 'comic sans ms'">A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class, because it was... a weapon of math disruption. </span></strong></p><p> <strong><span style="font-family: 'comic sans ms'">No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery. </span></strong></p><p> <strong><span style="font-family: 'comic sans ms'">A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for littering. </span></strong></p><p> <strong><span style="font-family: 'comic sans ms'">A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart. </span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'comic sans ms'">Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie. </span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'comic sans ms'">A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it. </span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'comic sans ms'">Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana. </span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'comic sans ms'">Atheism is a non-prophet organization. </span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'comic sans ms'">Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway. One hat said to the other: 'You stay here; I'll go on a head.' </span></strong></p><p> <strong><span style="font-family: 'comic sans ms'">I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me. </span></strong></p><p> <strong><span style="font-family: 'comic sans ms'">A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said: 'Keep off the Grass.' </span></strong></p><p> <strong><span style="font-family: 'comic sans ms'">The midget fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large. </span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'comic sans ms'">The soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran. </span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'comic sans ms'">A backward poet writes inverse. </span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'comic sans ms'">In a democracy it's your vote that counts. In feudalism it's your count that votes. </span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'comic sans ms'">When cannibals ate a missionary, they got a taste of religion. </span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'comic sans ms'">If you jumped off the bridge in Paris, you'd be in Seine. </span></strong></p><p> <strong><span style="font-family: 'comic sans ms'">A vulture boards an air plane, carrying two dead raccoons. The stewardess looks at him and says, 'I'm sorry, sir, only one carrion allowed per passenger.' Two fish swim into a concrete wall. One turns to the other and says 'Dam!' </span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'comic sans ms'">Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit a fire in the craft. Unsurprisingly it sank, proving once again that you can't have your kayak and heat it too. </span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'comic sans ms'">Two hydrogen atoms meet. One says, 'I've lost my electron.' The other says 'Are you sure?' The first replies, 'Yes, I'm positive.' </span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'comic sans ms'">Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused Novocain during a root canal? His goal: transcend dental medication. </span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'comic sans ms'"></span></strong></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="nikonpup, post: 145549, member: 9922"] [B][FONT=comic sans ms] [HR][/HR] [h=3] No Pun In Ten Did [/h]PUNS FOR EDUCATED MINDS The fattest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference... He acquired his size from too much pi. I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out to... be an optical Aleutian . She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still. A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class, because it was... a weapon of math disruption. No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery. A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for littering. A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart. Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie. A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it. Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana. Atheism is a non-prophet organization. Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway. One hat said to the other: 'You stay here; I'll go on a head.' I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me. A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said: 'Keep off the Grass.' The midget fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large. The soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran. A backward poet writes inverse. In a democracy it's your vote that counts. In feudalism it's your count that votes. When cannibals ate a missionary, they got a taste of religion. If you jumped off the bridge in Paris, you'd be in Seine. A vulture boards an air plane, carrying two dead raccoons. The stewardess looks at him and says, 'I'm sorry, sir, only one carrion allowed per passenger.' Two fish swim into a concrete wall. One turns to the other and says 'Dam!' Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit a fire in the craft. Unsurprisingly it sank, proving once again that you can't have your kayak and heat it too. Two hydrogen atoms meet. One says, 'I've lost my electron.' The other says 'Are you sure?' The first replies, 'Yes, I'm positive.' Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused Novocain during a root canal? His goal: transcend dental medication. [/FONT][/B] [/QUOTE]
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