Wedding Story - Did I Act Wrong?

gohan2091

Senior Member
Hello,

I'm a semi-professional photographer and have shot half a dozen Weddings among other things. In summer 2013, I photographed a couple for their engagement. I charged only £50 ($82) and they provided me with travel (I don't drive). They were happy with the photos and asked if I could be their Wedding photographer for 26[SUP]th[/SUP] January 2014. I said I would be delighted and quoted them a price of £150 ($248) I'm aware my prices are low, but I am still developing my photography and my confidence behind the camera.

I went over the details of the Wedding on email a few months after the engagement shoot; I also gave them a link to my portfolio (again). In late December, the lady asked what my return taxi would cost and would be ok if she came to my home on the Friday (24[SUP]th[/SUP]) before the Wedding to drop off the money instead of paying me on the day. I replied and agreed. In January, I asked if they would be happy for my sister to come along and be a second shooter. She is interested in photography and has accompanied me once before. The lady said this is totally fine with them. On 20[SUP]th[/SUP], I went over the details of the Wedding a final time. I didn’t receive a reply. I sent another email yesterday (24[SUP]th)[/SUP] saying I haven’t received a response from her and that it was my understanding that she wanted to deliver payment on this day. Again, no reply.

Today I sent her a couple of text messages asking if she received my email and if she could reply when she has time. I also left her a voicemail. I didn’t receive a reply. After another text with no reply, I texted saying I am not sure what to do and that I don’t want to pay money for a return taxi if the Wedding has been cancelled. She replied immediately with “Wedding is cancelled”. I replied saying it’s none of my business but why is this? And why couldn’t she let me know in advance? I concluded my message by saying I am sorry to hear this and hope she is ok. I didn’t receive a reply.

I then thought since I haven’t texted her since the summer, that she may have changed number and who I am texting is another person, pranking me, pretending to be her. I decided to call the hotel where she is having her reception and ask if it’s been cancelled. The hotel said it’s still going ahead as planned. Confused, I texted the lady and said I’m not sure what’s happened but I’ve just contacted the hotel and they tell me the reception is still going ahead. She immediately replied with “You have no right to do that, that’s cheeky and rude, you don’t know what’s going on so how dare you call the hotel”. I text back explaining that I have her best interests at heart and the last thing I want to do is miss her Wedding due to a prankster falsely telling me the Wedding is not on. I said you’re clearly not happy, I am sorry and that I won’t message you again if that’s what you want.

Was I wrong to contact the hotel? Why didn’t she have the decency to tell me it’s been cancelled or that I am no longer required? Why do I have to message her numerous times for her to tell me this? I am very frustrated and disappointed. My fear was that the person who I was texting was not her, and that she for whatever reason, didn't check her emails and that she was expecting me on her Wedding day tomorrow and I didn't show up due to a prankster. I could get into trouble for ruining her Wedding day.
 
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Mfrankfort

Senior Member
No, not wrong. You'd think they would be more in contact with you. We got married a little over a year ago, and my wife called the photographer and pretty much everyone like 10000 times, lol. Sounds like they're just not very organized. You were right.
 

Ruidoso Bill

Senior Member
That's exactly why a written contract and deposit are the best way to go.

The contract clearly spells out your performance, dates and compensation. It should also contain cancellation policy and loss of deposit by a certain date.

Lets turn the tables a tad and pretend you had turned down a better gig, one that paid more etc, who would be the loser in this case.

Get it in writing and get the deposit (substantial), keeps a cousin from doing it for free at the last minute when funds get short.
 

gohan2091

Senior Member
Thanks guys for your replies, I feel a little bit better now but I still have this sick feeling in my stomach which hopefully will go away soon. WJYPhoto, you are right and I think I will do this from now on. I'll ask for a deposit and write a small note with details of the cancellation policy and loss of the deposit. It does sound like she found another photographer that's cheaper but I already feel my prices are very cheap to begin with. I now hope the photographer does a less than acceptable job because I feel bitter about the whole thing. :(
 

Mike D90

Senior Member
Thanks guys for your replies, I feel a little bit better now but I still have this sick feeling in my stomach which hopefully will go away soon. WJYPhoto, you are right and I think I will do this from now on. I'll ask for a deposit and write a small note with details of the cancellation policy and loss of the deposit. It does sound like she found another photographer that's cheaper but I already feel my prices are very cheap to begin with. I now hope the photographer does a less than acceptable job because I feel bitter about the whole thing. :(

Don't fret this. If it had gone on, and you had shot the wedding, it may have become a nightmare for you afterward. And a cheap nightmare at that. Next time, get a contract and deposit as advised. Get your confidence up before you take on another event like this and you won't feel so bad over losing one in the future. She probably got a family member to do the shots for free. She will probably regret it.
 

Scott Murray

Senior Member
Sorry to hear about your frustrations. I agree that you have done the right thing and they should have been more in touch. I have a similar wedding coming up but I have the knowledge that they have paid for my flights ($600) and are willing to pay me more for the photos. I have told them to wait until they see the photos before paying me (less stress), I am paying for my own accommodation (Studio apartment with spa) at my own choice as it will be nice to relax afterwards in the spa. I guess your example goes to show that everyone could have the best intentions but due to unforseen circumstances or input things change. Its disrespectful that they didn't have the decency to get in contact with you, but you shouldn't feel bad as you have done nothing wrong and tried in their best interest to get a hold of them. They lied to you "THE END" how you deal with this is up to you. I personally would not do any work for them again. Live and learn get a contract written up and signatures, and as you said a deposit.
 

Lawrence

Senior Member
Good advice here but …..

I now hope the photographer does a less than acceptable job because I feel bitter about the whole thing. :(

Doesn't benefit anyone - least of all you.
Just let it go and learn from it.


 

Moab Man

Senior Member
Maybe it's a generational thing, but I do not understand this whole conducting business by text. Does no one know that phones can be used to talk to people? With the lack of reliability of texts, and not being able to hear inflection in a text it seems like a really bad idea.

No, I don't think you did anything wrong, but I would change my business model.
 

gohan2091

Senior Member
I prefer text and email to telephone calls, then we can reply when we want and there is a written record of everything that's been said. In this situation, I've already done a job for the couple and met them in person. Money was exchanged for photos and everyone was happy. I trusted them and had confidence. I've learnt something today from you guys so thanks very much.
 

Sambr

Senior Member
I don't think she found a " cheaper photographer " I think she found a professional photographer. Sorry but six weddings does not make you a proffesional. Study with an established pro for a few years then I would consider you a pro. I am sick & tired of people buying a digital camera and considering themselves pros. I don't agree with the way she fired you - however she did the right thing. Remember this is a very special day for them. If you were to have heart surgery would you want a doctor whom had very limited experience to perform the operation or one that had years of experience to cut you.
Sorry I don't feel for you.
 
No matter what the reason she should have had the decency to let you know in advance and especially wrong of her to outright lie to you. Calling the hotel and finding out that the wedding was still on just shows you what kind of person she really is.
 

Geoffc

Senior Member
I don't think she found a " cheaper photographer " I think she found a professional photographer. Sorry but six weddings does not make you a proffesional. Study with an established pro for a few years then I would consider you a pro. I am sick & tired of people buying a digital camera and considering themselves pros. I don't agree with the way she fired you - however she did the right thing. Remember this is a very special day for them. If you were to have heart surgery would you want a doctor whom had very limited experience to perform the operation or one that had years of experience to cut you.
Sorry I don't feel for you.

I was just about to say say pretty much what Sam said although he probably put it better. I was thinking she thought you too cheap and it rang alarm bells. If a friend of mine said they had a £150 wedding photographer I would tell them not to do it even if you had good stuff to show. £150 doesn't even cover your time to take the pics and then process them at minimum wage and all business transactions should work for both parties.

I think her communication was just a poor way of letting you go. Personally I probably would have rung the hotel and I would have then let them know I'd rumbled them just for not having the decency to let me know I was dumped and for not offering to pay a proper price for the engagement pics. My wife would have counselled me not to do it but I wouldn't have been able to help myself.
 

Moab Man

Senior Member
I prefer text and email to telephone calls, then we can reply when we want and there is a written record of everything that's been said.

That was my point, it's impersonal. Through verbal communication you might have heard a souring of the arrangement prior to and alleviated some fears or whatever the anguish might have been.

And that's what a contract is for.

Again, it's entirely your choice of how to do business. That was just my two cents or whatever the exchange would be in the U.K.
 
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Just-Clayton

Senior Member
I had a similar situation. I had the date set on my calendar, the times and everything. Sat down with the couple as what they were looking for. A couple months went by and the bride to be was on her porch getting the mail from me. Saying, they were saving for Christmas. I said then you need to save for that wedding. She says "we decided to put that on the back burner". It would have been nice for me to know this.
 

Nero

Senior Member
sound like she found someone to shot the wedding for less money and was not up to telling you.
Considering the quality of images that people who charge super low prices for wedding shoots take, I bet they're regretting it now if that's true.
 

Brian

Senior Member
You caught her in a lie, she was hiding behind her texts, you did nothing wrong. Having a written contract and a deposit to cover costs would be wise for the future. I'm guessing if you had talked with her, the sound of her voice would have been the give way.
 

ShootRaw

Senior Member
I don't think she found a " cheaper photographer " I think she found a professional photographer. Sorry but six weddings does not make you a proffesional. Study with an established pro for a few years then I would consider you a pro. I am sick & tired of people buying a digital camera and considering themselves pros. I don't agree with the way she fired you - however she did the right thing. Remember this is a very special day for them. If you were to have heart surgery would you want a doctor whom had very limited experience to perform the operation or one that had years of experience to cut you.
Sorry I don't feel for you.
That is alittle harsh..His experience says Semi-Pro...He doesn't make his $$ solely from his photog..
If he did he would of done the contract deal..Cant blame him for trying to make a go at it..Got to start somewhere..I do believe his prices were way to low...Engagement shoot should have least been $250..And atleast 2k for a wedding...
 
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