Lost Mom

Danno

Senior Member
My Mom was diagnosed with a UTI a couple months ago and she was pretty confused because of it, but three weeks ago on Saturday my sister took her to the emergency room. By Sunday evening they determined she had 3 tumors in her brain, but they were inoperable. The only option was chemo or radiation.

Mom had an advance directive and DNR refusing all further treatment so while Pat and I drove from Kentucky to Ft. Smith, Arkansas my sister got our Mom in hospice. We got there Monday late and met them in the Hospital. Mom and I had a conversation Friday. Tuesday she could barely communicate by this last Thursday she was gone.

The last 3 days I was the only one that could get her to speak and than it was 4 words… “I love you too.”

I know she is home with Jesus and reunited with Dad, but I de miss her.

My mom and I spoke every day. That can still end in seconds. Hold those you love close.
 

mikeee

Senior Member
I'm sorry for your loss, Danno. I am glad you got to be there to tell her you love her. I don't think there could be a greater gift.
 
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hark

Administrator
Staff member
Super Mod
Contributor
I am so sorry for your loss, Dan. Your mom sounds like she was very much loved. It's never easy to lose someone we love - especially someone we are so close to. She left footprints on your heart which you will always carry with you until you meet again. Cherish the wonderful memories you shared, and during the times you struggle with this, just remember you were there with her those last few days. For most of us, our parents raise us, but as we get older, those roles tend to switch. Quite often we are the ones watching out for them.

I've been going through this myself as my mom passed in March. She had fallen here in January, and because she broke her clavicle, she required assistance to get up and down that I alone couldn't provide. She went to a nursing home where her care was absolutely horrible. However, due to COVID, I couldn't visit. 19 days later she wound up back at the ER in horrendous shape. It was then they told me she was near the end of life. When she was released, I was able to get her into the best nursing home in the county...one that is run by the government. After about a month, she was scheduled to come home on a Friday. Sadly she passed the Tuesday night just 3 days sooner.

Having dealt with my mom's UTI's during her last few years, it's terrible how confused people can become when they are experiencing one. That alone is so hard to deal with, but your beloved Mom's tumors on top of her UTI probably made it so difficult for her to communicate. I'm glad you were able to speak with her and have her respond to you. Hold onto the memories you shared with her. You and your family will be in my prayers.
 

Dawg Pics

Senior Member
My condolences to you an your family, Dan. It is a blessing you could spend some time with her during her last few days.
 

Danno

Senior Member
I am so sorry for your loss, Dan. Your mom sounds like she was very much loved. It's never easy to lose someone we love - especially someone we are so close to. She left footprints on your heart which you will always carry with you until you meet again. Cherish the wonderful memories you shared, and during the times you struggle with this, just remember you were there with her those last few days. For most of us, our parents raise us, but as we get older, those roles tend to switch. Quite often we are the ones watching out for them.

I've been going through this myself as my mom passed in March. She had fallen here in January, and because she broke her clavicle, she required assistance to get up and down that I alone couldn't provide. She went to a nursing home where her care was absolutely horrible. However, due to COVID, I couldn't visit. 19 days later she wound up back at the ER in horrendous shape. It was then they told me she was near the end of life. When she was released, I was able to get her into the best nursing home in the county...one that is run by the government. After about a month, she was scheduled to come home on a Friday. Sadly she passed the Tuesday night just 3 days sooner.

Having dealt with my mom's UTI's during her last few years, it's terrible how confused people can become when they are experiencing one. That alone is so hard to deal with, but your beloved Mom's tumors on top of her UTI probably made it so difficult for her to communicate. I'm glad you were able to speak with her and have her respond to you. Hold onto the memories you shared with her. You and your family will be in my prayers.


We were blessed Cindy, I do not want to think what this would have been like in the middle of COVID. My wife Pat, my sister, her husband and their family down to the great grandson were all there. The home even let Jersey Girl, my dog who mom loved more than me sometimes, lay in the bed with her. I am sorry for your loss. It is difficult, but I cannot imagine what it was like with the obstacles you faced.

My Greatest Joy is that Mom is home now and I will catch up with her. God is good.
 

Marilynne

Administrator
Staff member
Super Mod
Sorry to hear about your mom Dan. She's in a better place now. No more suffering. You and your family will be in our daily prayers.
 
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